I spend more time than I should looking at WordPress themes. One thing I’ve noticed about them is that the authors almost always describe their themes as being “clean”. They also emphasize how they put the emphasis on your content. The claims are made so often that they are pretty much meaningless. But that’s not really what I’m looking for. What I need is a theme that is ridiculously garish and busy enough to actually distract people from the fact that I never update the site. Where’s the theme that can give me that?